I am ill and I am burdened with so many woes
Unable to think straight not knowing what goes.
So many I’ve talked with but what can they solve
It only makes life harder just trying to resolve.
I know many wonder why I keep things in
But only I know my intentions. I feel it is no sin.
Why burden them with explaining the grief I go through
It will only cause pain knowing there is nothing they can do.
The support from all loved ones gives me great pride
Just knowing they are here for me keeps me alive.
I try real hard to do for myself,
But at times I am thankful they are here to help.
Alone all day long I am lonesome and blue,
Keeping it to myself on what I should do.
Limited doing things while losing my steps.
Not getting done in my home I once kept
Please know, I ask for no pity for how I now feel.
It is what it is and I must learn how to deal.
I could wish on a star to get my life back
But then maybe, just maybe
Life might be worse than where I am at?
Vickie Welsh Diagnosed. 2010 with Cerebellum Ataxi
I have not posted on this site for a very long time, but I do read the weekly update.
Your poem touched my heart.
Although my ataxia (caused by a stroke 5 years ago) is not genetic, therefore not progressive, I can relate to all your feelings which you describe so well!
Yes, it is what it is and we must deal with it and as you said , if we had our life back, it could be worst than were we are now…
So, dear Vickie, keepyour spirits and hang in there and thank you for opening your heart. I understand… we are all here for each other…
Cicina
Thank you for reading my thoughts. I have to tell you this as I truly feel that God took part in creating this poem.
I was doing something and in my mind things were popping in and out. I finally gave up what I was doing and went to my desk. Started writing down what was heavy on my mind. It took me exactly 15 minutes to write this poem, I never hesitate on any one part. It just out of the blue was what I wrote, I have never done a poem in my life before and now I have wrote a few more when the feeling hits me. To me it is so unbelievable.
So I guess I give God the credit for this Poem. Thanks for the kind words!
Thanks Vicki. The poem was nice. I first was diagnosed with cancer in 2011. I could still walk n balance but have to take medicine daily to pass motion n boost of muscle after that want to but sometimes can other times cannot. I have atypical parkinsonism which progresses faster. Under atypical it is msa boost my bladder was an issue in Oct 2015 n I have to go to toilet every 2 hrs. Now is shorter. I am seeing a urologist. I am homebound and use the frame to walk. I go to church with my wife n children on a wheelchair bcos of my balance n my talking is getting harder n writing is not clear. You r right no one can understand what we r going through. For me every day is different n I get more tired easily n can’t eat much. Best regards Jacob
This is Jacob. Sorry typo error. Not diagnosed with cancer in 2011 but cerebellar ataxia. Now msa. Multiple system atrophy. Bcos of my bowel n bladder. Walking slower. My balancing not good n must walk with a rollater. Homebound n now my talking not clear. Brgds Jacob